Random thoughts while washing dishes.

It's been a long time since i posted on my blog(s).  Too long.
Many posts started.
Many posts left unfinished.
Such is life.

I know a lady who has Alzheimer's. She was a prolific crocheter.  Skien after skien of yarn we gave her.
She is in a nursing home and was very convinced that she was being held against her will. She was also very convincing.

What do you like to do?
I like to crochet.
You should crochet.
How can i crochet when i have no yarn.

Skien after skien of yarn we handed her.

Everyone who met her was convinced that she would be o.k. She would adapt, if she just had some yarn.

Can you get her some yarn? She's bored. She wants to crochet.
Skien after skien of yarn we handed her.

Her dresser drawers were filled w/unfinished projects.

This is beautiful handiwork. Will you finish it?
How can i finish? I don't have any yarn.

The post list on my blogs are like this.
If only i had more "yarn"
yarn being time, ideas, focus, motivation, energy

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The Zen masters say "do one thing mindfully". "When you wash a dish, simply wash the dish".

"If only," says my soul
"Get over it," says my brain "silly zen masters. You have to work for a living. Free thinking must be squeezed in  between responsibilities." My brain can be a real bitch.
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There are many cans of garbanzo beans on the counter. Like 6 cans of garbanzos. And a half bag of dried.
Yeah. I had plans baby. Big plans.
Garbanzo goddess, i am.
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You know, i don't understand this whole terrorist thing. This intense fear of Syrian refugees.
Of course bad people are going to sneak in with the good people.
That's just how it is.
Bad people sneak into everywhere. No more babies then. Bad people sneak into the world out of birth canals too.
But really, are you that afraid?

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You know what makes me stop and ponder?
In one of the front yards in my neighborhood there is a used disposable diaper. It's been there for over a week. Since the night of the big wind, it's been there. Why has no-one picked it up?
Today about 3 feet away from the dirty diaper there was a wrapped condom.
Why?
Is it a gift? A suggestion? A statement? Art?

I wanted to take a picture.
But it was light out. It's a weekend.  People are home. My 2 dogs were pulling on their leashes and ....
i was a little nervous.

We live in a society with a old west mentality.
A piece of paper allows anyone to "conceal & carry."

Yeah.
Paris was horrific.
Beirut- horrific.

Isis -horrific.
Redneck Roy with his pistol in his back pocket - horrific.
Oath keepers  - horrific.
Oklahoma bombing,
Columbine, Newtown, Chardon, Umpqua - horrific.
Road rage - horrific.


You are afraid of refugees? I'm afraid to go to a movie.
Or to Walmart. Some pistol packing mother may leave her purse open.
I may get my head blown off by her curious toddler.

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I hate Walmart.  Shit probably happens at Target too though.

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Why aren't people up in arms about this conceal and carry nonsense? I mean. WTF??? I personally don't want to have to worry that the dude in line behind me at the grocery is carrying a fucking pastor. Ha ha. Pistol. Or a pastor too, really. Those people can be really annoying. And they're probably packing.
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I should make hummus.
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I'm not really afraid of refugees, terrorists, rednecks, death. Bring it on.
I am afraid of growing old.
And not having enough yarn.

Random memory

Right after we moved into our house, my husband & I were investigating all its nooks and crannies. We were examining the closet in my son's room  when we met the previous tenant.

She was a large lady .. or man. Frighteningly large. Huge, I would say. And those legs .... shew.... those legs didn't stop. And her skin, black and shiny as though she had been freshly washed and waxed. We never got her name.  Our screams sent her scurrying &  we never saw her again. 

But I will never forget her.  She was aaallll legs. Had she wanted to, she could've become a frightening bracelet around my dainty wrist. Which... actually could've been pretty cool. Maybe we could've become a fantastic crime fighting duo webbing up  ne'er-do-wells and what not. Giving Spider man a bit of competition - or assistance. Or, at the very least we could've made one heck of a fashion statement.

As I said she was a big lady.  There was just not a jar big enough to catch her and put her outside to prey on mice and stray cats. And, she looked indestructible .... and crunchy. Like, if you tried to stomp  her, she would simply lift a leg, easily place it on your shoe, give a little flick and flip you over in a most graceful Ninja spider kind of way. But, if you happened to be successful, the squishing would sound like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir munching potato chips in unison. CRRRRRUUNCH!!
Although, she was so shiny and slippery looking. Any attempt of squishing may have resulted in the would be squisher to land flat on his back vaudeville style.

Thankfully she scurried into a hole in the baseboard before we had to act. Being expert new homeowners, we promptly filled the hole with a crumpled sheet of notebook paper, then closed the closet door and never spoke of it again.

http://imgbuddy.com/misunderstood-spider-meme-wasp.asp

If you have to decorate a tree

When I was a kid, I loved decorating the Christmas tree. And by decorating, I mean hanging every last bulb and bauble on that poor tree then topping it off with a box or 2 of tinsel.

But, I'm all grown up now, allegedly. And, um, I still do the same exact thing hee heee.  Well, actually, this year my personal tree was quite grown up, thank you.

However, every year we have decorated a tree at a local metro park. These trees are always themed & the decorations are sometimes handmade - or, some of them are anyway.

Our tree is usually the most full and ..... umm..... interesting.

& yes, it's January. But xmas is an insane season. & honesty, i don't know if anyone actually sees the tree at the part. Allegedly, it's always very crowded and chaotic there during their holiday festivities.

So, these are tree ideas i thought i would share in case someone ever has to do a silly themed tree &, i don't know, because i have pictures of these trees and need to do something with them.

This year, the tree had an elf theme. This was a theme that had been used before. So, some of the elves were able to be reused. However, most of the other decorations had become scattered.

Anyway - pretty simple - Just took pictures of staff & residents and  print shopped the faces onto elf bodies. Time consuming but doable.

The other decorations were simply toys purchased from the dollar store.

(some elfin faces have been blurred d/t hippa)

 One of my favorite decorations on this tree was the jacks. And the super balls.

I kind of liked this tree this year. I thought it was kind of playful and happy. Of course, the other trees were way more mature and not nearly as full. But...... screw it. 

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Last year, the theme was "pearls of wisdom." This was an idea given to me by another activity director. 

She had scoured thrifts and gotten pearl necklaces and such throughout the year. I tend to live more "spontaneously". There was a lot of stringing of beads going on. Eventually I found cheap pearl-like garland at Marc's. Shew! At first I thought - hey, let's make our own pearls. I & "M" "A" & "K" gave and great college try. But..... no. We did end up with 

cute -ish little pearly decorations though.

Some of these we hot glued pipe cleaners to and then made that curly-q thing w/a pencil, you know?

Basically, the tree consisted of pearls and stuff.

We also cut hearts out of poster board, decoupaged wrapping paper on them.  Then we asked the residents to share some "words of wisdom." And put them on the hearts. The project was a bit larger than I would have liked it to be.

& oh, yes - there was a crap load of bow making. Thank goddess for you tube.

 Oh, yeah. We also made these sparkly things with glitter and Pledge.

 The tree was a bit loppy. But .... meh.

_______

The year before that we did a woodland theme. Same concept as the elves, but turned people into little animals and used pine cones and birds and such for decorations. 

Can't find those pictures though. 

Thanks for reading. Feel free to leave constructive comments or questions. 

why that jewish lady singing to the christian lady is no big deal (o.k, kind of a big deal but ... not really)

There are a couple of things that are circulating on Facebook that have me more than a bit irked.  First.....

This is an awesome video. I've seen it circulating with the description something like "a Jewish lady sings to a Christian lady." BFD. The lady singing is Naomi Feil. She created the Validation technique, a way to interact with people who are treading water in  the murky slough of Alzheimer's.

The fact that Naomi is Jewish and Gladys is Christian has absolutely nothing to do with anything here. Although Naomi has a graduate degree in something & her title is a social worker, she is basically just an activity professional. And when one is just an activity professional, one is whatever one is needed to be in the moment. Jewish, Christian, Hindu, Buddhist, Muslim, Atheist. It just doesn't matter. There is no religion when it comes to working w/Alzheimer's residents. All you needs is empathy, patience, compassion and most importantly detachment from a supposed end result.

This is not a  Christmas miracle or even an example of god's greatness. (I think those who think this should read up on the symbolisms of validation technique.) This is is just what any activity professional that is worth a damn would do.

So, Get over it!!

Naomi may well have worked with Gladys every day for 6 months, a year, a week. Maybe not singing these songs, but sitting with her holding her hand, reading to her, massaging her forehead, showing her pictures ..... whatever. Or, this may have been their first interaction. There is no formula nor timetable. Also, Naomi may have seen this response only once. Gladys may very well have retreated back into her memory den, never to respond in this or any other way again.

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I once worked with a lady i'll call "B". She was deeply confused and extremely anxious. Her disease was not as progressed as Gladys'.  B was still verbal although to describe her speech as nonsensical would be an understatement. I decided i was going to have a poetry group and see what happened. I shut the door, put on relaxing classical music and showed the residents pictures of landscapes. Most everyone fell asleep except B.

B & I looked at a picture of the ocean. I told her we were going to write a poem. And asked her to talk to me about the picture. She asked what it was. I told her it was the ocean.

& this is what we got:

I've always liked the Ocean, 

my mother was born very near it. 

I've always thought my father kept a magical part of it in his soul. 

I've always liked the ocean.

It's wild and uncontrollable. 

Alive, not easily reachable. 

Marvelous waves. Unstoppable.

You can't stop a wave.

My mother and father were close to the ocean.

I didn't know that until they were older. 

Stronger. 

My memories of my mother and father are as of the waves. 

Unstoppable, beautiful.

I've always liked the ocean. 

Yes. She said all that. I arranged a bit. But those were her words. And yes, she did repeat "i've always liked the ocean."

And... this never happened again. I tried ... a few times. But that was all she had to say about that.

 I guess. 

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I once worked w/a lady, "L". L loved to stay in her bed and make wonderful works of art on the wall with her feces. She was combative, aggressive, downright nasty & minimally verbal. She was pretty deep into her disease and also very very hard of hearing. One to one time w/L. was one of my one to one assignments.  Yay. :/

Since communication was limited, i simply visited w/L and showed her pictures. By doing this i discovered that she really liked birds as evidenced by the length of time she looked at those pictures and a softening of facial expressions.  I decorated her walls with pictures of birds. 

I decided we would try some coloring. I brought a coloring page of a bird and crayons & showed it to L. 

Nothing.

I colored a bit of the picture then offered her the crayon. She took it and began coloring ... just a little. She said "pretty." Just a word but an appropriate one. When I left she said "Thank you."

Did she ever color again? Hell no. Nor, did she ever really interact with me that positively again. But that one time was pretty cool. And it happened after weeks and weeks of visits. 

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I guess what i'm saying is this: no matter how deeply entrenched a person is in her Alzheimer's/dementia. She is still in there. And bringing her out, getting a response, is a lot of work sometimes. And a lot of detachment all the time. But it can be done. For a moment anyway. And if it is done, it will usually be done by those who are considered to be the lip gloss of the facility. Those with the "cake job." By those people who are just activity professionals.

In case you want to go a-Maying

I was going through my photos and came across the pics from last year's Maypole "dance" at work.
A Maypole dance was one of those things that i always thought would be cool to do; then last year finally did, and will probably never do again.

Making the May pole was pretty simple.  There was a piece of some kind of heavy plastic-y piping left from some work that was being done. The magnificent maintenance director cut it down to size that i wanted.

All i did was wrap it with brown duck tape, tape strands of crepe paper to the top of it and stuck some artificial flowers on top. Voila.

Rocks in a beach pail in another pail thing worked to get to stand upright. 

And that was it. 

The whole thing as actually rather successful simple because members of departments were in  good moods (or just curious) that day and helped push people in their wheelchairs around the Maypole. 

We ended up with a rather large number of people who wanted to participate. I ended up adding more strands of paper to the pole. 

So, there ya go. Happy Maying. 

spin the bottle

So, here is an idea that most activity directors etc. have probably already done. However, I am going to share it anyway.

Many years ago i put together this game for Valentine's day. And every now and again we try to play it.

This year we had students from a neighboring school visit on Valentine's day. So, I drug the bottles out of the basement & gave it a go again. & this time it went quite well. So, I would say that it's a good game to play when you have plenty of help.


This is just a simple version of spin the bottle. I decorated my bottles, but that certainly isn't a must do.

We use candy kisses of course. The cards are from a reminiscing game, Shake Loose a Memory, I think. The cards have things like "keep this card if you've ever baked a cake from scratch" on them.
With spin the bottle, we just changed the verb-age - "Get a kiss if you've ever ...."

You could make up your own cards for continuity of the game if you wanted. I've just never been that motivated. 

You could also use trivia cards or you could do something like a name 3 game - where the person has to name 3 types of pie or whatever. You could also have the person roll dice and name ... i don't know... 5 types of birds or whatever. Then she could get 5 candy kisses. Your residents would like that. 

They usually like candy. And again if you feel motivated, you could make up cards for that. 

Anyway - the bottles took a long time and a bit of decoupage for me to make. So, I guess I just wanted to show them off. ;)

Thanks for reading.  Feel free to leave suggestions, questions &/or comments.

Cheapie balloon bags

Hey. Happy New Year.

The first year I had to do the New Year's eve party I invested in balloon bag kits. They were kind of expensive, hung too low from the ceiling and really didn't work very well.

So, the next year I had to think of something else.

I am sure that this was not an original idea. Probably a thousand and one activity directors are rolling their eyes saying "DUHHH".

But anyway - you can make a kind of o.k. balloon bag out of a cheap, plastic, dollar store  tablecloth.

Here we go: Get yourself a plastic tablecloth. Unfold it until it is halved. Then put one or two little slits in it.

Lay it out

Then bunch the ends and tie w/ribbon

Then put in balloons ( the balloons were 20 for a dollar at Dollar General). How many balloons you need depends on how much you blow them up. Usually a 100 - 150 balloons will make 3 balloon bags. I was lazy blowing them up this year, so the bags are not as plentiful as in past years. But that just means there will be a little less waste. 

I like to throw in some serpentines b/c ... well, I like serpentines. 

I kind of stopped taking photos here b/c ... I just wanted to get it done. 

But I tend to staple the bag closed as I fill it. It ends up looking kind of like a body bag. (Well, it does.) 

The first year I made it like a hammock and filled it after I hung the 2 sides. It looked pretty hanging, but it was a pain in the butt to hang and fill. 

If it's all closed up, it's easier to hang from the ceiling. 

I add extra long strands of curly ribbon from the ends so and throw serpentines over it to dress it up a bit when it's hanging. 

If I think of it, I will take a photo of the finished work of "art" and post it later. 

Of course the efficiency of the bag depends on how low your ceiling is. Someone has to stand underneath of it and rip it open. 

You could probably devise some kind of something with ribbon or string to rip it open if the bag is out of reach. Like if you made, like, small slits down the length of the bag then stapled ribbon or twine or i don't know something to an end. Maybe you could pull it open. Or if you put 2 bunches of strong ribbon or something in the middle, maybe you could pull it apart like a curtain. I don't know. I've never had to worry about that. 

So, anyway. There you go. 

Happy new year.